You sleep on a bed fashioned from discarded Clapton guitars.
Your religion is listed on Facebook as “The Holy Order of Cranking It Up to 11.”
You’ve inquired about changing your name to Baba O’Riley.
The point is, you dig music.
And we have some speakers for you...
Kick out the jams for Well Rounded Sound, an earnestly named line of made-to-order and bespoke loudspeakers that are basically the sonic promised land, available now for tasty lick playback.
So, speakers. You plug them in, press play. Music commences. Everyone’s happy. These are no different. Except for the fact that they’re pretty much acoustically perfect. They’ve got full-range drivers that produce 3D sound (which is a thing), pure signal paths and sound-optimized wooden or felt enclosures. We don’t have a clue in hell what any of that means either, but it translates to versions of “Stairway to Heaven” so clear you can practically hear the studio engineer ashing his cigarette in the background of Page’s solo.
The move here is to hop on their site and pick out a pair. Include a little note about what finish you want (you’re partial to carbonized bamboo). And yes, of course they’ll work with you on bespoke models. In a few short weeks, your neighbors will hate you.
But dammit, they’ll respect you.